Talking with Friends

So I'm trying to get away from talking about all the dead animals for a moment, for there hasn't been any new development.

This past week I have talked to 3 people on the phone, outside of my boyfriend. For me that is a record. No, it is not because my boyfriend is more important than my friends. The real reason is because I have never really had to call people on the phone to keep in contact with them.

Let me explain....

I have been through a lot. Yes, you have probably heard this from many people whose blogs you have read, but it is true. Before high school I didn't really have any close friends or people that I could trust. And when I did trust those few people, I would try to stay in touch with them, but they would never get back to me.

So as a result I had gotten used to not having friends, calling them, hanging out, etc. I am a little awkward when it comes to that. I will admit it. I hate admitting things, but it is the only way for me to get better.

Now ever since I have left high school and the 1st college I went to I miss my friends a lot. I really do. I have been afraid to call them though. The usual questions run through my mind:

• Do they want to talk to me?
• Do they still like me?
• Will they just ignore me?
• Are they upset at me about not calling me after so long?
• Do they think I'm weird?

And etc. The list goes on. So usually I have not called the people I used to talk to.

I was then inspired by one of my great friends, Leanne who had posted on here facebook that she had a little phobia of talking on the phone too! She doesn't know that I deal with it. She said that it is one of her new years resolutions that she is trying to overcome.

That has inspired me to add that to my new years resolutions as well.

I didn't have to call the 1st 2 people, they called me! They were my awesome friends from high school Jessica and Kathleen. I miss both of them and it was great to hear from them and talk to them. I tried calling one of my friends (this awesome girl has been leaving me messages say call her, so I wasn't too nervous about that) and I called her and her phone was acting up and her husband was home from boot camp for the weekend. I hope to hear from her today.

I then called my other friend Meredith, who I haven't talked to since August. I didn't get a hold of her. But she called me back yesterday which was really great.

There are many more people I want to call , but I'm nervous too. Some of them I have never really talked to them on the phone and yet I have there number. Others I was just friends in high school with them, but since I have left I haven't really talked to them, unless I bump into them.

So I don't know what to do. Should I call them, email them, send them a letter?

I am new to having to keep friendships because this is the first time I have had friends I want to keep in touch with.

If anyone has advice, please leave some comments. Thank you :)