My How Things Change

It's weird what can happen to a person over a year. Heck over a few months. 

All my life I have been a very passionate person. At times I felt like I had all of this passion inside of me waiting to be used and I had no idea how to direct it.

At times it has gotten me into trouble, other times I got into huge arguments.

I was/am passionate about a lot of things: my country, the military, my family, my faith, my friends, etc.  I love learning, reading, writing, the arts, music, politics, etc. What I believe in, what I love is what I am passionate about.

I realize though you can't live 24/7 with this passion going on. This may sound strange to some of you, but imagine if you are the Energizer Bunny with a Solar Battery that is constantly being charged and going on and on and on...

You get the idea.

You can't live life like it is a constant battle. Like you are taking on the next challenge. Many will probably disagree with me and that's fine with me. I understand, I used to be that passionate. But eventually you have to realize that if you keep going down that route, you will burn out.

I realized it these past few months. I am full of life and love to live life, but I know people who always seem to be "on."  It seems they never take time to relax or sit back and enjoy life.  No, to them life is a constant battle and one must always live with Passion 24/7, night and day, awake or asleep. That's exhausting.

Why?

What is wrong with taking time with life? What is wrong with having free time? These people seem to need to feel every waking minute of there day learning something, doing something, etc.  Don't they want to have time to relax, to be at peace, to think about the fun stuff of life, etc...

Why must it be this constant battle where everything must always get fixed, where we must always focus on an injustice or something that is terrible and evil and wrong? Why do we constantly have to fill every moment of our lives to the point where we are exhausted?

Is it bad to look at the fun little silly things that are going on in life? Why is it considered "degrading oneself" to  love fashion or sport for example? Why must we be wary of those that are different in thought than us?

I finally got an answer after 2 months.

They don't want to face themselves.  It sounds crazy, but it's true.  When we fill up our lives with constant activity, we don't take time for ourselves and we don't take time to examine ourselves. We need that time for ourselves to not only take care of our physical health, but our mental health especially. Sometimes people use all that activity and all that passion for fixing/changing problems they see in the world as a way to distract themselves from their own problems, their own issues. Hate to break it to you, that won't help you with yourself at the end of the day.

This semester although I have had a filled schedule, I forced myself to take some time for myself because of my health. I think it helped a lot too. I learned a lot about myself too and not only did I face the baggage I had, I faced my nasty, not so good side.

I'm not perfect. : /

After facing the the rest of the baggae (there was a little left) and coming to terms that at times I can be nasty and judgemental. It's hard facing tha truth.

Through discovering this, I dscovered some friends of mine were staying active, leanring, working, and fixing everything else but themselves. Some of them seem to live with this chip on their shoulder and they can't let it go because they don't know how to.

I know it's not easy, but it is very liberating and it helps a lot. Because of this discovery I feel a lot morrelaxed and at ease. It's a shame that those that I know are still trapped in the world were they have to escape from their problems.

Having passion is wonderful, more people need to have passion in their life. But to have it 24/7, although it sounds wonderful it is also time consuming and becomes very exhausting. Being able to relax and enjoy oneself is also a wonderful thing. 

A Song Review: I'll Throw a Grenade at Ya!

I know Bruno Mars has been around for two almost three years now. I have heard a couple of his songs: The Lazy Song and Just the Way You Are. The one song though that I cannot stand is his new song "Grenade." I don't like it, it is annoying and ridiculous. Everyone thinks that the song is romantic, are they listening to the same song as I am? Here are the lyrics thanks to elyrics (I cannot guarantee accuracy):

"Grenade"

Easy come, easy go, that's just how you live
Oh, take, take, take it all but you never give
Should've known you was trouble from the first kiss
Had your eyes wide open, why were they open?

Gave you all I had and you tossed it in the trash
You tossed it in the trash, you did
To give me all your love is all I ever asked
'Cause what you don't understand is

I'd catch a grenade for ya
Throw my hand on a blade for ya
I'd jump in front of a train for ya
You know I'd do anything for ya

I would go through all this pain
Take a bullet straight through my brain
Yes, I would die for you, baby
But you won't do the same

No, no, no, no

Black, black, black and blue, beat me 'til I'm numb
Tell the devil I said, hey, when you get back to where you're from
Mad women, bad women, that's just what you are, yeah
You'll smile in my face then rip the brakes out my car


Gave you all I had and you tossed it in the trash
You tossed it in the trash, yes, you did
To give me all your love is all I ever asked
'Cause what you don't understand is

I'd catch a grenade for ya
Throw my hand on a blade for ya
I'd jump in front of a train for ya
You know I'd do anything for ya

I would go through all this pain
Take a bullet straight through my brain
Yes, I would die for ya, baby
But you won't do the same

If my body was on fire
Ooh, you'd watch me burn down in flames
You said you loved me, you're a liar
'Cause you never, ever, ever did, baby

But darling, I'd still catch a grenade for ya
Throw my hand on a blade for ya
I'd jump in front of a train for ya
You know I'd do anything for ya

I would go through all this pain
Take a bullet straight through my brain
Yes, I would die for you, baby
But you won't do the same

No, you won't do the same
You wouldn't do the same
Ooh, you never do the same
No, no, no, no

If you were able to make it through reading the whole song I congratulate you. I could not, for it is already in my head. So much so that I was humming it during both of my classes today. My boyfriend and I cannot stand this song, seriously I throw my hand on a blade for ya/ I'd jump in front of a train for ya.....

Hey, I like back massages and chocolates. Even better than that, take me shopping. You really don't have to throw you hand on a blade for me, its not like the blade is going to jump out at me and scream "I'm going to cut you!"

It takes a lot for me to be turned off from a an artist, well he has lost a potential fan unless he makes up for it by writing a better song. Yes, I do not like him or this song. Grenade=terrible.

Here is the Orginal Video of the song:

Here is a Parody by The Key of Awesome... I enjoyed this one. They do some great parodies!

My Christmas Gifts

This past Christmas was a very awesome one. I got to have some new amazing experiences, spend time with my family and receive awesome gifts.

I hope everyone got what they wanted and had an amazing Christmas and an Amazing New Years as well. If you didn't, just remember that things will get better. It will take time, but all good things come to those that who wait and have hope.

I am going to share a brief of what I experienced and got this Christmas. I will spare you and not go into the details.

Here is what I experienced:

1. The Wizarding World of Harry Potter at Islands of Adventures
2. Hollywood Studies of Walt Disney World
3. Magic Kingdom of Walt Disney World
4. The Beautiful Hotel that we stayed at..I forgot it's name

What I received:

1. How to Be Lovely: The Audrey Hepburn Way of Life by Melissa Hellstern
2. The Secret by Rhonda Byrne
3. Fairest of All: A Tale of the Wicked Queen by Serena Valentino
4. Abigail & John: A Portrait of a Marriage by Edith b. Gelles
5. In Mozart's Shadow: His Sister's Story by Carolyn Meyer
6. A Writer's Workbook by Caroline Sharp
7. Breakthrough by Colbie Caillat
8. All I Ever Wanted by Kelly Clarkson
9. Back to the Basics by Christina Aguilera
10. Blackout by Britney Spears
11. The Young Victoria
12. Empires: Queen Victoria's Empire
13. PBS' Marie Antoinette
14. Marie Antoinette (Kirsten Dunst)
15. Vampires Suck
16. Much Ado About Nothing (1993 version)
17. Andre Bocelli Vivere Live in Tuscany
18. A new Radio- it can play Cd's and my IPhone and it charges it too. Yah I have been wanting one for over a year!

But the best thing is of course is that I have been able to spend time with my family, friends, and my boyfriend. That was the best part of it all.

I'm thankful I'm a Writer because....

I’m thankful I’m a writer because it helps me to talk with people and deal with my emotions. I have a hard time in the past expressing my emotions because I have always felt and have been taught that a person should not wear their emotions on their sleeve. So I have only had a few outlets in life to help express myself emotionally. First it was dance, then music, and now for quite some time writing. I started dancing when I was 5 years old and have loved it ever since. With music, either through playing my flute or singing, I still have a love hate relationship with flute and singing, well I have been told that I can sing well, but I still feel self conscious. With writing though, it is a whole other story.

With writing I have always loved the thought of writing books and having other people read them and love them as I have when I pick up a book. I have so many ideas that I simply want to share with the world. I don’t want to just write fantasy, I want to write sc-fi, historical fiction, nonfiction, romance, biographies, self-help, religious, poetry, short stories, essays, etc. I want to write in ever field of writing that exists, why because I have so many amazing ideas and I know I can blow the world away with my writing.

I am really good; when I actually apply myself; when I do, I feel like I have really accomplished something amazing and spectacular. In my mind I hear a voice say, ‘yes there is something that I am good at that I know I can make a profit off for the rest of my life’. Is that the reason I write, because I want to make a profit and become famous, YES! If any writer says that it is not for the fame or profit, or both, I would say they are lying or they have been writing for many years in the business and don’t care about all that anymore. I could be wrong though.

There is another reason why I love writing and therefore I am thankful. I am great at writing, I really am. To be honest I want to be great at everything I do whether it involves music, art, athletics, etc. It is that same with writing. It does come naturally to me and whenever a person is naturally gifted at something, it should be cultivated and shared with the world; take advantage of this wonderful opportunity.

Most of all, I am thankful for being a great writer because the best part is that you can talk about everything. That is a very good thing because I find everything interesting and fascinating. Few things in life bore me and this is a perfect outlet for me to be able to explore the world and express myself as well; all for the sake of my next book. I am truly thankful.